Thanks, Universe

I feel happy today. I read once that people don't recognize when they are happy often enough, so I want to try and do that more. But mainly I got on here to post something I've been thinking about. I'm starting to think that I believe somewhat in that theory that if you put something out into the universe, it will happen; sort of like self-fulfilling prophecies. This is pretty much opposite of how I normally see the world, but there are just little things that I look back on that either I or someone else said, or I thought, and then I realized much later that these things have come true...like there was foreshadowing going on in my life without me even knowing it. I'm sure that this happens to everyone, and probably happens even more than I realize, sometimes in the form of me doing things I say I will never do. I just remember my sophomore year of high school, we played a get to know you game in seminary, and one question we had to answer was "What is the funnest date you've ever been on/a date you want to go on" and as a little 15-year-old with no dating experience I decided to go big or go home and say "Disneyland." And my teacher said "whoa, that's a pretty big date. Maybe save that for your honeymoon." It was only much later, looking back on the year, that I realized "hey, I did what I said I wanted to do" because later that year, before I went on any "real" dates, I ended up going to Disneyland with a school group where a boy I didn't know before, for reasons I could not fathom, started to talk to me, and hang out with me, and share his food with me, and text me when we weren't together, and ride the rides and go to shows with me, and sit with me talking about surprisingly deep and emotional thoughts that we had, and walk through Downtown Disney with his arm around me in what I can only describe as my first little fling where I felt like here was a boy that I want to be with all the time, with us texting the whole drive home and sleepily finding each other at each gas station pit stop because we were on separate buses, until we got back to the real world which luckily still included texting and chemistry class, actually (what is it about chemistry class...), at least for that school year. While that was not technically a date where a boy asks a girl out, I still count it. Prophecy fulfilled. Also, I was not planning on writing that all out but it was an event in my life that I had forgotten about and it was kind of fun to look back on it.
The other example I was thinking about was funny because I don't know if I subconsciously knew what I was doing or if it was just a coincidence. For some reason one of my favorite memories I have of my sister and her husband is this one time my other sister and I were driving to their apartment, and we got to the parking lot, and it was a crazy windy day, and we just see them holding hands and laughing and running through the parking lot and I don't know why that image is so vivid in my mind but I just thought "I want that. I want that someday." Flash forward to about a month ago, and I'm walking down the parkway holding someone's hand and not wanting to stop holding it because I knew once that day was over then everything was probably over. And it was a really windy day. And I don't even remember why, but we started to run across the road through the parking lot to his car. It's only now that I thought "Well, you got what you wanted."
Also I wanted to share this quote that I got from facebook (which doesn't make it any less true, I guess): "We must be willing to get rid of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Now I am more of a believer in making your own luck and taking what you want rather than destiny and such, but I do think this is a good reminder that we don't always know best and sometimes better things will happen than we can even plan for if we are ready and open for them.
Well now that my journal entry is complete, I will finally stop rambling. Over and out.

Perspective.

I was reading in the National Geographic today about languages that are disappearing. Apparently they estimate that a language dies every 14 days! There is one, Tuvan, which is a language spoken in Russia by only 235,000 people as of now, of which they gave some example words and their meanings. Two of these words were songgaar: "go back; the future" and burungaar: "go forward; the past." The article then says, "Tuvans believe the past is ahead of them while the future lies behind. The[y]...look to the future. but it's behind them, not yet seen."
When I first read them, I thought "well that is backwards, it makes no sense." The more I thought about it, though, the more sense it made, and I realized that even though the way I viewed these ideas (the past is behind us, the future ahead) is to the best of my knowledge the way everyone in my world has always viewed them as well, that doesn't mean it is necessarily correct. Or maybe it would be better to say the only correct way to view them. In reality, the ideas of "future" and "past" are not physically somewhere in relation to us, so there is no reason why the ideas both can't be right.
I've been thinking a lot about perspectives lately, probably because it has come up in a lot of life lessons lately. Maybe everyone else is already aware of this, but to me it seems like a change in perspective is a better way to find happiness than just focusing on a positive/negative dichotomy. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with trying to look on the bright side and stay happy no matter what happens. But sometimes, i'mma be honest, that is hard and really just not effective, for me anyway. I feel like I'm lying to myself when I'm trying to stay positive but still know deep down that something straight-up sucks. I'm really only able to get past things when I can realize that yeah, maybe this does suck, or at least part of it does, but there is this whole other vantage point that in my narrow-mindedness I couldn't or wouldn't see. And when I finally do see it, my brain just kind of goes "ooohhhh. well, duh." The problem is opening up my mind and getting to that point, which, to be honest, rarely happens totally on my own.
To use another National Geographic example, maybe a slightly metaphorical one: there are some cities, such as Seoul, Bangkok, and Paris, that just don't have a lot of room for gardens and green spaces. With problems like that it's easy to just say "Well, that's too bad, I guess don't move to the city if you're looking for that sort of thing." It's not like this is a problem I was actively trying to solve, but if I read in the newspaper an article about how there was no room, I would probably just accept it and feel a little sad. Luckily there are people who don't just settle for that, and now there is an increasing movement to grow gardens pretty dang efficiently up the sides of buildings, like so:

"Ooohhh. Well, duh. There is so much space there just waiting to be used." The plants help with air quality, bring beauty to crowded cities, and some of them are even vegetable gardens. Perspective.

This may have not made much sense. But this was one of those "learn-as-you-blog" posts that helped me more than anything. Thank you for your time.

P.S. I went to look up the Angelina Jolie Sleeping Beauty movie, and I thought you had texted me that it was called "Magnificent." Turns out it's called Malificent ha. If you thought it was kind of dumb of me to ask what it is about with that title. I just wanted to redeem myself a little.

I watch these sometimes, and I laugh a lot

Although I'm Somewhat of a Purist With The Saying, This is Still Cool

http://www.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk/#create

I could probably make quite a few of these. I already made one that I feel is very applicable to my life, somewhat unfortunately for you.


http://bit.ly/Pp9qik

People Are Generally Good

That is my philosophy. I read a card on Postsecret the other day that said something close to this: "If my daughter goes to a frat party, does shots on an empty stomach, passes out, and gets raped, I will blame her." In response to this, someone wrote: "My sister went to a frat party, did shots on an empty stomach, and passed out. Someone made her an omelet."
Maybe I'm naive, but I believe in humanity as a whole. That's not to say you shouldn't be cautious and careful, because there are apparently people out there who will kidnap you and make you into clothes (I just watched Silence of the Lambs so that was in my brain), but at the moment I still think that the world really is the best.
Keep it up, guys.

Ever have those days when you just want a boy? Today was one of those. I feel like I shouldn't, but then another part of me says that its ok sometime. It's just unfortunate that there will probably be many, many more of them. And today it was also combined with no desire to make any efforts towards anything, even sitting upright, at this point. At least it hit during summer when I can just nap and read this blah away.

It's Getting Better

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/faithbased/2012/06/mormons_and_gays_why_the_lds_church_might_be_evolving_.html

Thank You, Fruit Bats, For Having The Courage to Make This Music Video

I think its a good one. I like the song a lot, so the video is just a great bonus.

I'm Such An Order Muppet

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/low_concept/2012/06/what_kind_of_muppet_are_you_chaos_or_order_.html

     I have these songs that I listen to when I am sad. The thing is, some of the songs are also sad. I'm not sure why, but they make me feel better, or maybe they only make me feel like I'm not alone in my feelings... I don't know. Anyways, I just wanted to share them, so here they are.

"Happiness" by The Fray

"While My Guitar Gently Weeps," "Yesterday," and "Let It Be" by The Beatles

"You Do, You Don't" by The Friday Night Boys

"Iris" by Goo Goo Dolls

"Collide" by Howie Day

"Just A Kiss" by Lady Antebellum

"Falling" by The Civil Wars

"Yellow" by Coldplay

"Mad World" by Gary Jules' (cover)

"Dust In The Wind" by Kansas

"Dirty Paws" by Of Monsters And Men

"Summer Home" by Typhoon

"Beautiful Girl" by William Fitzsimmons

just to name a few.

     However, when I actually feel like getting out of my sadness, I listen to this version of "I Know That My Redeemer Lives" by David Osmond. I feel better every time, without fail. It also makes me feel not alone, but in a way completely different from the way any of the other songs do; I actually don't think anyone besides my Redeemer could give me this same feeling. And it is a good feeling--maybe even the greatest feeling.

Month Of May

Today, as I was filling up plastic tubs with mouse food, a thought occurred to me that both made me smile and think "Wow, you're an idiot" to myself. This last month, the month of May, really could not have been more perfect. My life was crazy amazing, everything worked out so well, and I was blessed beyond even what I probably know. When I realized that, I wanted to go back in time and punch myself in the face for not just being in a constant state of delight and gratitude. Now, I know that while I'm living out my life I will probably never get to the point where I am happy and grateful for all I have to the extent that everything in my life deserves. And I'm not saying that I was an ornery and ungrateful jerk the whole month; I was actually happy and content most of the time, with a few exceptions. I just really regret not being more aware of how blessed I really am. I will now try to partially remedy this by making a list, one of my favorite pastimes, of all the reasons that May made my life awesome, because I don't want to forget them. This will be for me, and probably boring for you, so I will not feel bad at all if you choose not to read it.

• I finally got the job that I had basically been trying to get all semester long. This by itself is a miracle worthy of its own list (which actually isn't that big of an honor, I guess). The way that everything fell into place is a testimony builder that things were not just randomly falling. And I am one lucky girl to have the connection I did to get the job, because there is no way in Hades I would have ever gotten it on my own. And there is similarly no way that I would have found another job that is this closely related to the kind of thing I want to do for a career and that pays this well. 
• I got to go home. I really like living in the "big city," and I am excited to move back, but being home is nice for a bit, too.
• I have gotten to see all of my immediate family members at least twice. They are my favorite people to hang out with (no offense to anyone else). I just really like them.
• Season two of Sherlock came out. 
• The weather's been a champ. Maybe not ideal for all the crops that need a bit more rain, but for me it's been great.
• I have gotten to see old friends. This actually should rate higher than the weather, but I forgot it till just now. Which is silly, because I truly get by with a little help from my friends. I will never stop owing them.
• Weekly dates with my boo. I'm reeeaalllyy gonna miss that. Sometimes I have issues and get a little crazy (but not any crazier than any other girl, I know) but I am happy to report that after the major breakdown of '12, of which you were forced to be a textual participant, from the combined efforts of friends, family members, time, sleep, reasoning, and most importantly actual communication with said boo, I am totally fine with the whole situation, and have healthily reconciled expectations and reality (see: 500 Days of Summer). Life is good. I'm not crazy

There is probably so much more, but I'm tired and that is all I came up with at the moment. All in all, it's a pretty solid list and I'm glad it's mine.

One Out Of One!

Randomly thought I'd check and see if there were any new Kid Histories (Historys? Why is this difficult?) Turns out there was a new one released two days ago, and if you haven't seen it, I think it's a good one, kind of a simple classic with some good lines. I hope you enjoy it.

Chubby Girl Problems

Today, Lady Fitness called me and asked if I wanted to come in to take some free classes and have a free consultation with a personal trainer. You know you have a problem when the gym calls you and gives you free workouts. 

And So It Goes

This last week has been a little rough for me, for a few reasons. But there have also been some really great things happen. I think the two have kind of cancelled each other out up until a little while ago, and I was just feeling really empty. I won't go into all the details of everything I was thinking and feeling, but I will just say that I took a temple trip with my singles ward, which I haven't been really been active in so far this summer, and several aspects of that trip kind of calmed me down and answered some problems I have been thinking about (answered some problems maybe doesn't technically make sense but it is the most accurate phrase that I can think of). Not everything was fixed, but it was probably the best thing I could have done.
Now instead of emptiness, I feel like this song.
Enjoy.

P.S. I just want to say that I do not like that the zombie apocalypse has started. No, not one bit.