http://www.schwarzenegger.com/fitness/post/perfectionism-when-beautiful-isnt-beautiful-enough
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Good read
And so applicable to all of life, despite the title and source, especially once the end bit comes. I enjoyed it! Consider me motivated!
Sunday, March 8, 2015
Happiness
If there is one thing the internet DOESN"T need, it's another list of...anything. So I apologize for adding some more noise to the enormous and magical black hole that both facilitates modern life and drags us down in one way or another. (Seriously, the internet is one of the most interesting phenomena of ever, in my opinion.)
I've just been having a really good few weeks, and I've had a pretty good 22 years, so I wanted to put down in words some of the things that I have found help me to be my best. I don't know if I've mentioned this (I probably have) but for the last few years, my motto/vision/mantra for myself has been "Be Myself Completely." This will obviously be a lifelong pursuit, but what I've found is that the small positive things I do in my daily life not only bring me closer to this vision, but also bring me the everyday happiness that we are all looking for, the happiness that really matters. None of this will be particularly innovative, nor is this a claim that I "have it all figured out," or that I have eliminated rough moments and days. This is just some things I've experienced that I don't want to forget. So without further ado, here is my personal "Top Ten Ways to Facilitate Happiness (in no particular order)."
1. BEWARE THE COMPARE
"Comparison is the death of joy" -Mark Twain
Amen, Mark, Comparing myself to other people has been one of the most toxic activities I have participated in throughout my life, and it's hard because I am constantly doing it, even at a subconscious level, I think. Potentially the worst part about it is that I'm usually comparing myself to inaccurate portrayals of people or life, whether because I am assuming something or I just don't have the whole picture. One of the greatest things I've gained from this semester's yoga class is to make the conscious decision to let go of comparisons. It's not easy, but being aware of it definitely helps. And once I start seeing people and thinking "Hey, you're doing great at being you!" rather than just comparing myself to them, it becomes easier and easier to do it the next time.
2. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE
I have expressed before that my love language is "quality time" and that is accurate. Nothing makes me happier than to be with friends and family that I love, and that love me. Finding the people that will help me to be my best, and that I want to do the same for, and then spending all the time I can with them is what gives life meaning. Of course I appreciate some good alone time, but all in all I am of the opinion that humanity is a group effort, so let's be friends!
3. LOVE AND RESPECT YOUR BODY
I feel so. much. better, when I am living a healthy lifestyle. In the month and a half right after my mission I didn't really exercise and I was eating about the equivalent of one large meal and maybe one snack, as my entire intake for the day. This left me with the approximate physical fitness of a newborn kitten. Two things bothered me about this: 1. I had very little endurance, and though there were athletic things I wanted to do, when I tried they were harder for me than they used to be. 2. I was thinking about food all the time, worried someone would ask me about how much I've been eating, worried that I wouldn't be able to force myself to eat enough when I was with other people so that no suspicions would be aroused. I was just all-around not in a healthy place. But by now, my eating is back to normal (except for the fact that I live on the grocery budget of someone with negative income, but that's a work in progress) and I'm working on doing some form of exercise six days a week (plus a Sunday stroll, I just feel bad counting that as a form of exercise haha). Whether that be yoga, hiking, going for a good walk, working out with Jillian in my room, this goal of daily activity really has done wonders for my happiness level. I really just want to get back to the point where my endurance is strong enough that I can do whatever physical activity I want without feeling super weak and unable. And I firmly believe that no matter where you start, if you go at it every day eventually things will change! Also I want to have a healthy old person body.
4. SET SMALL DAILY GOALS
The VGPA form of living was drilled into me pretty hard on my mission (vision, goals, plans, accountability, if it's not something everyone does.) and I really do think it's the way to achieve your dreams. I haven't been super great at mapping out my future (as I've designed it) so far, but I have been trying to set small daily goals for myself, and it's helped a lot. One form this takes is a to-do list. It sounds so small but it really does wonders. Other goals I've set have been simple things like "don't get on social media for two days" or "don't check your phone at all during classes" or "in every conversation you have, try to really focus on the other person and what they are saying, and show you are listening." And then when I do these things, even if I don't do them perfectly, I at least feel that I had purpose and made progress.
5. REMEMBER THAT YOU'VE GOT "NOTHIN TO WORRY ABOUT"
I could make a separate list for all the song lyrics that have changed my life, but this one in particular has made a big difference during times when I get overwhelmed and just want to roll over and give up. Wisdom from Peter Bjorn and John:
"Negative, why always so negative? If you've got problems why don't you go solve them?"
For some reason when I hear or remember that line, I get instant clarity, and think "Ok yeah, let's figure out the aspects of this problem I can fix now. And the ones that I can start working on fixing now. And the ones that I can't really fix on my own, I'll get help with or figure out how to move on." This is obviously easier said than done, but it truly has helped me turn a few mountains back into molehills.
6. STAY ON A SPIRITUAL INCLINE
This one deserves more than one step in the list, but I'm making the list so I can do what I want. It's really pretty simple. I need to go church. I need to read my scriptures every day. I need to pray nearly constantly. I need to attend the temple (working on weekly right now). I need to keep my spiritual life at the center of all that I do. It's an easy thing to back-burner, but so much of the peace I've experienced has come from staying strong and active on my spiritual journey, and I intend to keep it that way.
7. BE PRESENT
Probably the biggest lesson I've learned this semester, from various sources (cough cough, yoga again), is to live in the moment I'm in. We hear it all the time, but it's really true. It's definitely something that's a work in progress for me, but it's so key to happiness. Elder Olsen from the Seventy stressed this point for us in stake conference today, telling us not to live in the past, in the future, in some other geographical location, or with people other than the ones you are with (not that we shouldn't keep in touch to an extent with loved ones who are far away, of course). His talk made me realize how much we miss if we spend our time wishing things were different, when really each situation we are in and every person we are with has something we can learn from.
8. SEE THE WORLD
I wish that for me this meant "travel the world," and maybe I'll get there. But I have just found so much joy in taking in my surroundings recently. I have the nice opportunity to walk a lot, and I've been trying to take different routes, paying attention to details on the houses and buildings, the people I see, the sunsets and sunrises. I have been trying to spend time in nature, in the mountains and gardens. Since I no longer have an ipod (haha) I feel like I do more observing and pondering while walking, whether it be around campus, to the bus, or just for fun. And it makes me happy.
9. RECOGNIZE AND SACRIFICE NEGATIVITY
This one has two levels. There are things that are easily recognizable as negativity-inducing, and there are things that are not inherently bad or negative but for one reason or another provoke that sort of response from me. And it's hard for me to distinguish in which situations I need to change or sacrifice something inside of myself to adapt, and when I need to sacrifice something external in efforts of self-preservation. That can be hard, and sad. But it's also necessary, and ultimately freeing.
10. LOVE LOVE LOVE
It's of course not enough to get rid of the bad, but it's necessary to fill life with the good! I love animals, gardening, eating oranges, playing the piano, exchanging smiles, Indian food, taking naps on the ground, sugar cookie tea, wearing dresses, sunshine, listening to music, and reading books. I also love to love people and things that I didn't always love. And to help other people find and experience love. It's just the most important principle to live and share, and it somehow manages to fix most problems, in my opinion.
In conjunction with step 10, I'd just like to close with the lyrics to this song from Goodbye Mr. Chips (an excellent film, btw) that you may recognize from the MoTab "Showtime!"album:
"In the morning of my life I shall look to the sunrise
At a moment in my life when the world is new
And the blessing I shall ask is that God will grant me
To be brave, and strong, and true,
And to fill the world with love my whole life though
In the noontime of my life I shall look to the sunshine
At a moment in my life when the sky is blue,
And the blessing I shall ask shall remain unchanging
To be brave, and strong, and true,
And to fill the world with love my whole life through
In the evening of my life I shall look to the sunset
At a moment of my life when the night is due
And the question I shall ask only I can answer
Was I brave, and strong, and true?
Did I fill the world with love my whole life through?"
Namaste.
I've just been having a really good few weeks, and I've had a pretty good 22 years, so I wanted to put down in words some of the things that I have found help me to be my best. I don't know if I've mentioned this (I probably have) but for the last few years, my motto/vision/mantra for myself has been "Be Myself Completely." This will obviously be a lifelong pursuit, but what I've found is that the small positive things I do in my daily life not only bring me closer to this vision, but also bring me the everyday happiness that we are all looking for, the happiness that really matters. None of this will be particularly innovative, nor is this a claim that I "have it all figured out," or that I have eliminated rough moments and days. This is just some things I've experienced that I don't want to forget. So without further ado, here is my personal "Top Ten Ways to Facilitate Happiness (in no particular order)."
1. BEWARE THE COMPARE
"Comparison is the death of joy" -Mark Twain
Amen, Mark, Comparing myself to other people has been one of the most toxic activities I have participated in throughout my life, and it's hard because I am constantly doing it, even at a subconscious level, I think. Potentially the worst part about it is that I'm usually comparing myself to inaccurate portrayals of people or life, whether because I am assuming something or I just don't have the whole picture. One of the greatest things I've gained from this semester's yoga class is to make the conscious decision to let go of comparisons. It's not easy, but being aware of it definitely helps. And once I start seeing people and thinking "Hey, you're doing great at being you!" rather than just comparing myself to them, it becomes easier and easier to do it the next time.
2. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE
I have expressed before that my love language is "quality time" and that is accurate. Nothing makes me happier than to be with friends and family that I love, and that love me. Finding the people that will help me to be my best, and that I want to do the same for, and then spending all the time I can with them is what gives life meaning. Of course I appreciate some good alone time, but all in all I am of the opinion that humanity is a group effort, so let's be friends!
3. LOVE AND RESPECT YOUR BODY
I feel so. much. better, when I am living a healthy lifestyle. In the month and a half right after my mission I didn't really exercise and I was eating about the equivalent of one large meal and maybe one snack, as my entire intake for the day. This left me with the approximate physical fitness of a newborn kitten. Two things bothered me about this: 1. I had very little endurance, and though there were athletic things I wanted to do, when I tried they were harder for me than they used to be. 2. I was thinking about food all the time, worried someone would ask me about how much I've been eating, worried that I wouldn't be able to force myself to eat enough when I was with other people so that no suspicions would be aroused. I was just all-around not in a healthy place. But by now, my eating is back to normal (except for the fact that I live on the grocery budget of someone with negative income, but that's a work in progress) and I'm working on doing some form of exercise six days a week (plus a Sunday stroll, I just feel bad counting that as a form of exercise haha). Whether that be yoga, hiking, going for a good walk, working out with Jillian in my room, this goal of daily activity really has done wonders for my happiness level. I really just want to get back to the point where my endurance is strong enough that I can do whatever physical activity I want without feeling super weak and unable. And I firmly believe that no matter where you start, if you go at it every day eventually things will change! Also I want to have a healthy old person body.
4. SET SMALL DAILY GOALS
The VGPA form of living was drilled into me pretty hard on my mission (vision, goals, plans, accountability, if it's not something everyone does.) and I really do think it's the way to achieve your dreams. I haven't been super great at mapping out my future (as I've designed it) so far, but I have been trying to set small daily goals for myself, and it's helped a lot. One form this takes is a to-do list. It sounds so small but it really does wonders. Other goals I've set have been simple things like "don't get on social media for two days" or "don't check your phone at all during classes" or "in every conversation you have, try to really focus on the other person and what they are saying, and show you are listening." And then when I do these things, even if I don't do them perfectly, I at least feel that I had purpose and made progress.
5. REMEMBER THAT YOU'VE GOT "NOTHIN TO WORRY ABOUT"
I could make a separate list for all the song lyrics that have changed my life, but this one in particular has made a big difference during times when I get overwhelmed and just want to roll over and give up. Wisdom from Peter Bjorn and John:
"Negative, why always so negative? If you've got problems why don't you go solve them?"
For some reason when I hear or remember that line, I get instant clarity, and think "Ok yeah, let's figure out the aspects of this problem I can fix now. And the ones that I can start working on fixing now. And the ones that I can't really fix on my own, I'll get help with or figure out how to move on." This is obviously easier said than done, but it truly has helped me turn a few mountains back into molehills.
6. STAY ON A SPIRITUAL INCLINE
This one deserves more than one step in the list, but I'm making the list so I can do what I want. It's really pretty simple. I need to go church. I need to read my scriptures every day. I need to pray nearly constantly. I need to attend the temple (working on weekly right now). I need to keep my spiritual life at the center of all that I do. It's an easy thing to back-burner, but so much of the peace I've experienced has come from staying strong and active on my spiritual journey, and I intend to keep it that way.
7. BE PRESENT
Probably the biggest lesson I've learned this semester, from various sources (cough cough, yoga again), is to live in the moment I'm in. We hear it all the time, but it's really true. It's definitely something that's a work in progress for me, but it's so key to happiness. Elder Olsen from the Seventy stressed this point for us in stake conference today, telling us not to live in the past, in the future, in some other geographical location, or with people other than the ones you are with (not that we shouldn't keep in touch to an extent with loved ones who are far away, of course). His talk made me realize how much we miss if we spend our time wishing things were different, when really each situation we are in and every person we are with has something we can learn from.
8. SEE THE WORLD
I wish that for me this meant "travel the world," and maybe I'll get there. But I have just found so much joy in taking in my surroundings recently. I have the nice opportunity to walk a lot, and I've been trying to take different routes, paying attention to details on the houses and buildings, the people I see, the sunsets and sunrises. I have been trying to spend time in nature, in the mountains and gardens. Since I no longer have an ipod (haha) I feel like I do more observing and pondering while walking, whether it be around campus, to the bus, or just for fun. And it makes me happy.
9. RECOGNIZE AND SACRIFICE NEGATIVITY
This one has two levels. There are things that are easily recognizable as negativity-inducing, and there are things that are not inherently bad or negative but for one reason or another provoke that sort of response from me. And it's hard for me to distinguish in which situations I need to change or sacrifice something inside of myself to adapt, and when I need to sacrifice something external in efforts of self-preservation. That can be hard, and sad. But it's also necessary, and ultimately freeing.
10. LOVE LOVE LOVE
It's of course not enough to get rid of the bad, but it's necessary to fill life with the good! I love animals, gardening, eating oranges, playing the piano, exchanging smiles, Indian food, taking naps on the ground, sugar cookie tea, wearing dresses, sunshine, listening to music, and reading books. I also love to love people and things that I didn't always love. And to help other people find and experience love. It's just the most important principle to live and share, and it somehow manages to fix most problems, in my opinion.
In conjunction with step 10, I'd just like to close with the lyrics to this song from Goodbye Mr. Chips (an excellent film, btw) that you may recognize from the MoTab "Showtime!"album:
"In the morning of my life I shall look to the sunrise
At a moment in my life when the world is new
And the blessing I shall ask is that God will grant me
To be brave, and strong, and true,
And to fill the world with love my whole life though
In the noontime of my life I shall look to the sunshine
At a moment in my life when the sky is blue,
And the blessing I shall ask shall remain unchanging
To be brave, and strong, and true,
And to fill the world with love my whole life through
In the evening of my life I shall look to the sunset
At a moment of my life when the night is due
And the question I shall ask only I can answer
Was I brave, and strong, and true?
Did I fill the world with love my whole life through?"
Namaste.
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Selfie Check
I have been evaluating me, and here is what I've found in the form of a list.
Strength: if things are not going well, i am able to recognize that they will work out with time.
Weakness (somewhat associated with my strength): I am constantly trying to live in the future, in the next stage of my life where everything will be "better"
I am somewhat prideful, coupled with a lack of self esteem. It's a tricky balance, but somehow I've mastered it.
I just want to be a classy woman.
I can't completely be myself around people if I at all feel the need to impress them.
I'm a minimalist when it comes to words.
Strength: if things are not going well, i am able to recognize that they will work out with time.
Weakness (somewhat associated with my strength): I am constantly trying to live in the future, in the next stage of my life where everything will be "better"
I am somewhat prideful, coupled with a lack of self esteem. It's a tricky balance, but somehow I've mastered it.
I just want to be a classy woman.
I can't completely be myself around people if I at all feel the need to impress them.
I'm a minimalist when it comes to words.
I would much rather watch a high school sports team play than any professional one.
I'm learning about the necessity of taking some risks in life. Not like the dumb kind. The worthwhile, character-building kind.
The general impression I give off is that I'm very serious. It's kinda funny. And kinda depressing.
The general impression I give off is that I'm very serious. It's kinda funny. And kinda depressing.
I frequently need to disappear with myself and evaluate how I'm doing and what I can do to change for the better.
And obviously my love language is words of affirmation. ;)
There is much more I could add if i kept this list long enough, but we'll call this good for now.
I think I found my type...
....and it's weirding me out.
A friend and I have recently been evaluating my celebrity crushes, and we found a potentially alarming pattern.
This guy of course has been in my heart for a while:
(that's actually not Johnny Depp. Although he gets five stars in my book as well. But then, who DOESN"T like Johnny Depp? Sorry, tangent.)
More recently I've developed kind of a thing for this one too:
A friend and I have recently been evaluating my celebrity crushes, and we found a potentially alarming pattern.
This guy of course has been in my heart for a while:
(that's actually not Johnny Depp. Although he gets five stars in my book as well. But then, who DOESN"T like Johnny Depp? Sorry, tangent.)
More recently I've developed kind of a thing for this one too:
And most recently of all, I randomly had the urge to watch this music video and experienced a moment wherein I realized I was attracted to Julian Casablancas, whose voice I've always adored but who I never thought was that attractive. Until now.
I just need to keep my eye out for a creepy, pale, long-and-dark-haired musical vampire! Because apparently that's my thing. (ok this picture of Julian is not that creepy but he can get there, trust me.)
I guess that would explain my childhood fascination with this piece of work:
Just please stop me before it gets to this point:
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