Ok. I've been a little emotional these past few days. And I maybe said/thought/felt some things that were uncalled for. (The previous post is not one of them, that song still holds true). But after a wonderful Krav Maga session (I forget how healing exercise as well as fake beating people up can be) I was finally able to get back to my happy place where I'm not mad at anything. Which brings up another point.
I really, really, really don't like the fact that I'm not able to feel the way I want to feel. In my brain, I know what and who I want to be, but it's probably the hardest thing I ever try to do to make myself feel the way I want to. I don't know if it's just weakness or biology or the natural man or a combination of many different things, but it's something I'm not too fond of. Luckily I'm finding ways to effectively distract myself from the negative. Life is weird.
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